Before starting this, I'm apologizing to anyone who will feel affected about what I'm going to say. I'm going to use blind items as much as possible. Basta bahala na kayo mag-isip, bahala na ako sa opinion ko.
Thanks! :)

Just discovered the Ellen Adarna scandal. Hmm... well I really wouldn't call it a scandal. I don't really think that Ellen's a slut. I don't know her and I can't really judge her. All I have to say is that I don't know her history but what I do know is that people love to intrude into her life. I'm sure her privacy and more has been pretty much abused in many ways. So I can't really say she's a bad person.

However, it makes me realize (yet again) about the idea that it brings to me. Well... I'm happy about losing him. I don't want to lose myself to a defective hypocrite who doesn't really have a personality. I admit that I loved him... so very, very, very much. Nevermind his physical attributes, I loved him because of his personality. Though he's right, he has changed and that means I have no reason to love him anymore. He treated me like trash and didn't mind my feelings so why should I not do the same to him. Besides, that's how he is to people when he doesn't have feelings or use for them anymore. Nevermind what others feel it's just his feelings that are important. XP Oh well... I don't really care anymore if someone gets preggy or gets laspag or whatever happens. At least, I still have myself and I'm so happy I still have it. I shouldn't lose it to someone whom I can't even tell what persona he's really got or someone who has a history of lying or cheating. Because I don't want to lose myself to a husband who doesn't respect me. I don't want to lose it to a husband who (at some point in time) will fall out of love from me. I don't want to lose it to a husband who will bang other girls behind my back. I don't want to lose it to a husband who doesn't have self-control, one who gets easily snatched by other girls, one who can't resist the temptation to be with other girls beside his commitment to me. I don't want to lose it to a husband that only thinks of himself. I don't want to lose it to a husband whom I can't even tell what personality he's really got. Finally, I don't want to love a guy who will only love me because he wants something from me and/or someone who can't love me despite what I lack and/or someone who can't even wait (or nagmamadali in other words). (whew! ang dami ko'ng nasabi) Well... There's no way the guy and I are going to get back together again. Because I believe that once a guy cheats, he can do it again. He was so heartless to me and if he's that selfish, no doubt that nothing can anchor his loyalty and love to a girl even if she gives herself. Sure, it will keep him... until he eyes another girl or gets tired. And I'm happy because at least I get the chance to be with someone who respects me. Knowing what happens when a pervert and a slut gets together, I've accepted all my doubts to be true and if they're not... they will. :) After all, I had doubts before... well... everybody had... and they came true. Though who am I to talk? I don't know what's happening and nobody might ever will. So like my friends said to me. (If they don't want the truth to come out, you can't force them. It's their decision to keep skeletons in their closets. But the public will no doubt look at them in a bad way.) Argh! I so hate it when I talk about this. I mean, they're the least of my problems. >.< Maybe it's because they're the most scandalous. I don't know if they're happy getting the negative attention they want. But one thing is sure. At least, I'm sure that people know what really happened besides their stupid stories to redeem what's left of their reputation. Hehe, isn't it interesting how, they THINK people see them as a happy couple when they don't realize that people know about the issue(s) behind their relationship? It's like the Aniston vs Jolie issue. Although, we're not talking about a Brad Pitt here nor are we talking about a beautiful Angelina Jolie or Jen Aniston. Well... they go well with each other anyway. Haha... they look alike and people tell me their negative attitudes match as well. Lol... I guess I'm getting too nosy. Hehe, I'm still waiting for their karma, though. :) Anyway, all my friends say it was not my loss anyway, and I guess they're right. :) I have a great life with or without him. A lot of doors opened when one closed. True, it still hurts pero I've seen how I'm almost done recovering. I see now that it's all a matter of looking at the brighter side and how it's hopeless to still have regards for a selfish idiot. Everybody's right, there's no point dwelling in the past. Because the man I loved is dead and he is NEVER EVER coming back. He's been replaced by a bastard who only wants to make me miserable, one who's selfish and craves attention... and wierd. :) I've got a new slate now, I'm happy I finally see how lucky I am to be loved by my family, friends, pets, Piggy and myself. I'm happy that God's removing the bad people from my life and that he's really taking care of me and doesn't want me to be with someone who will only hurt me. *sigh* It's really sad how I want peace and truce but remembering, realizing and discovering how foul he treated and betrayed me, I can't find it in my heart to forgive him. I know I shouldn't be like this if I really moved on already but well... there's a scar and I'm still traumatized. Besides, it's not like he cares if he's forgiven or not. He's a dumb rock anyway. Erm... saying that, I don't deserve any forgiveness as well and I'm not asking for any... well at least from him... but heck, I'm not sorry for what I did to him just as he isn't sorry for what he did to me. I guess it's better as is at least I know that I really loved him to the point that it wasn't about infatuation anymore and that I loved him so much even if we didn’t see each other (i.e. distance and time didn’t matter) nor did I love him for what he gave me. I accepted him for what he really was and I've also accepted that he's changed... it's just that there's no point to love him because he's not the same man, hmm... it was selfless love, I guess.. all turned into hatred. Hmm... well... you only have a one in a million chance of finding someone who will love you truly. Too bad he didn't see that, well... at least it's not my fault that he got blinded and lost self control. Well, our relationship was truly a loss but at least I didn't fail it. I hope Piggy will be different and I so frickin hope he'll really love me... hmm... just realized na nakakasama ko sya almost 24 hours a day excluding our malling/touring. X( Still waiting for the universal retribution but I trust that God knows what he's doing. :) I’m really sorry if I suddenly get outburst like this but I’ve been told that expressing these emotions will hasten the recovery.

Changing the topic, I’m so <3 the Hed Kandi images. XD
*Fudgeness, I discover a lot of grammatical errors upon reviewing this >.<.*

A lot has happened since my last post (which was before the ADMU vs DLSU game). My Thursday last week was great! I watched the game beside my blockmates and Piggy as we spoiled each other with fries and popcorn. I finally felt the animo spirit back there and I also realized that I have what it takes to be a gang green. :) My happiest moments of the game were when there were waves. It was really insulting when Ateneo continued the DLSU wave and it went back five times (I think) before the game started. >.<

After the game, we went to Gateway. We were supposed to eat but every restaurant was full. We had no choice but to go home. On the way to our house, we passed by Mega. Me and Piggy decided to eat at Sbarro's. Thankfully, the ziti took away my disappointment. :)

On the Saturday before this day, there was a convention held at Galleria. Me and Piggy decided to eat at Sbarro's before watching The Simpson's first before going there. However, while we were on our way to the mall, he decided to surprise me by giving another ring which is exactly like the one I lost ( I lose rings a lot T.T) and how I can't forget his approach erm... it's too sweet to mention but the thing is when I recieved the ring, it was... erm... very piggy (lol I can't say it >.<). When we arrived, I saw a friend and she told me her story. I was am still enraged. I mean, how can a little girl of her age slut with my friend's cheating boyfriend?! I really can't believe that girl. I don't know if I pity her or not! First of all I pity her because she's just a teen! A minor! An innocent child! Second, the boy she slept with was my friend's guy! Third the little slut and my friend were best friends! Fourth, they were still together when she had her "first time" with him. And I can't frickin' believe her reason that she just wanted the boy to be her "first." Seeing how she totally wasted herself makes me realize how I should appreaciate myself right now. >.< And my friend said something about my situation and it was kind of disturbing. Hmm... I do wonder if my situation really is that similar to hers as she says.

Argh~ Yesterday started chaotic upon me waking up at 6:30 to prepare. I was to interview someone. Hmm... well I guess it went well... I got my answers but they're not the way my interviewee would expect. I got my signal upon asking three simple questions that if one is denied... well... hehe. All I have to say is... “Believe none of what you hear and half of what you see.”

After that I went back to school for my 11:20 class. I stopped by the chapel first, of course, with my silly piggy. :3

In the afternoon we went back to the mall and bought past issues of the magazines I was featured in. The pig plans to show the glossy mags to his clan. o.O Afterwards,I introduced Piggy to Mommy Rien and it was nice that she found him a little pleasant unlike the other one before. Haha.. Then, we ate at Sbarro's (my favorite restaurant). Piggy hasn't tried eating there so I introduced him to the basics which are baked ziti w/ garlic bread, white cheese pizza (for me) and Chicago deep (for piggy [he likes meat :( ]). It was obvious that he liked the food since he was very happy eating and eager to finish his half of the ziti. :) I spoonfed him with a generous serving of cheesy ziti and stuffed him with garlic bread after every spoonful. XD We were so full after sharing our whole plate of ziti that we had no idea how to finish our pizzas. >.< After that, we bought four handkerchieves for him because he keeps on losing them. Haha.. When I came home I found that the househelps have been spraying insect killer formulas in the house. I could smell the the moment I entered our gates. I immediately fetched a tornado fan and placed it in front of my pets (so the chemicals wouldn't concentrate around my pets) I also brought the fat Hammy outside. XD I introduced her to Freya but she startled her. So Bani, as always, kicked her floor. XD She's so cute. :3
Oh~ I can't wait for tomorrow! It's DLSU vs ADMU!!! Piggy tells me we might get a lower box ticket! XD Ooooh! My first game and we might get to watch it that near to the actual game!~ Weee~! :3

Yey~! We have tickets for the game this Thursday! ^_^ Jd was in school at about 8 and the line already reached the other building from Yuchengco which is SJ. o.O It was fortunate that JD found a way to get to the front before the selling started. Still, the tickets for the upperbox a were sold out before we even got there so we only have tickets for upperbox b. At least we still have good seats. XD Of course I had to reward my piggy for a job well done so while he was waiting in line, I bought him breakfast. :3 He didn't eat before he went to school because we knew that there'd be a lot of people there. ^_^ I hope we win... Animo La Salle!!!

Hehe... last Saturday, I got a haircut because I get a lot of falling hair whenever I comb. It's because my hair's too long and thus, too heavy. Plus, I'm a vegetarian so I don't really get much nutrition and my hair hogs all the nutrients from my food. T.T Anyway, after my haircut, the staff and the manager asked for my number. They want to get me as a model for their salon. XD Isn't it great? As payment, I can have my hair treated or trimmed without having to pay. Yey~!
*Sigh* Papa also talked to me the other day. It seems that he's going to let me handle a company once I shift. Hmm... I get a company for my 19th birthday. XD Cool~! I hope I handle it well. :)

*kilig* XD It's been more than a month since Mau's infidelity and I'm happy JD is here to comfort me. What happened to me was so tragic and traumatic that I don't believe how stupid people are for still trusting him. XP I'm still making my project about the matter. >.< Erm... as of now I've started on all three pages but none of them are complete yet. T.T Hmm... (Piggy's scratching my ear XD) :3 oink~

Hmm... it was Freya's birthday yesterday. Hehe... she's 2 years and a month old. :3 Aww... she is so adorable. >.< I love her so much. ^_^

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.


Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.


Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.


Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.


You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.


Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.


With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.


Max Ehrmann, Desiderata, Copyright 1952.